Thursday, December 22, 2011

A stressful today

Tonight, as I took a bite of pork dumplings that I had just cooked because I didn't have time to make a real dinner, I sighed as I looked down and saw Tessa staring at me expectantly.  Ian was putting Luca to bed, and while I wished I could just sit and have a few minutes to eat by myself, my pup had not been walked since Ian left for work this morning.

It was a very long day.  I had to do a run to costco to get a few things, but it happens to be about a 35 minute drive each way.  That does not seem like a bad thing, until you factor in a child who is unhappy in the car these days because it straps her down.  I continually hand individual toys back to her until she tires of it, then is ready for a new one.  I keep a stash of items in the car specifically for this little game, but she will easily make it through the stash within 15 minutes, then becomes restless and just wants out of the carseat.  It makes car rides full of anxiety for me, and tests my patience every single day. Costco was full of maniac last-minute shoppers.  I patiently manuevered my way through the store, getting my normal items (diapers, wipes, keurig coffee, trash bags, etc.).  I even kept my patience as I held a screaming Luca in my arms while trying to check-out.

Then, I dropped off the cold items back at the house, picked up my goddaughter, and headed to stop #2 - the mall.  I have mentioned before that I hate malls.  I get overwhelmed and hot and feel the need to escape almost as soon as I get to the parking lot.  I will spare you the details of this trip but consider it safe to say that it was a lot worse for my anxiety being that we are 3 days before Christmas and extremely crowded.  And with Luca there, I was so worried about the germs surrounding her.

Finally, we made it to stop #3 - the liquor store for a couple last minute items. 

By the time I made it home, I had been gone on errands for 6 hours.  Luca had reached her breaking point.  I was in the same boat.

Then I got home, and Tessa was in my face, wanting attention.  I had no more patience.  But I put on my raincoat and boots, and headed out into the rain to walk her.  It was cool, but not too cold.  And the rain felt good.  I pulled the hood back from my face and let the rain hit my skin.  I listened around me and heard sirens in the distance.  Then once those faded, I heard the pitter-patter as the rain hit the pavement.  I heard Tessa's collar chiming as she walked through the grass.  I closed my eyes and took some deep breaths and let the rain wash away the stress of the day. 

I took my time walking her, in no rush to go back inside.  And as I walked, I purposely reminded myself of all I have to be grateful for.  And I thanked God for all of my blessings, even on a demanding day.  I walked back inside, dried Tessa's paws, hung up my coat, sat back down, took a bite of the remaining dumplings, and took a big sip of wine, feeling much better afterall.

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