I woke up to him watching the morning news downstairs. I knew he must be stretching. Then I recalled the dream I'd just had. I had a dream I was pregnant. It was so vivid and felt so real. Once I was fully awake, I thought about when I should be getting my period, and realized I was a few days late, which isn't entirely abnormal for me. I decided to head to the bathroom and take a pregnancy test. But with what felt like period cramps, I figured it would show up negative. I started washing my hands and cleaning up the sink area when I looked down at the test.
Imagine my surprise when I saw the plus sign forming. Pregnant? We weren't planning on this - I mean we were planning for a family - but not right now. Could this be right? I was officially 4 days late.
I calmly went to our bedroom and put on normal clothes and then called down to Ian to come upstairs. He hesitated, asking what I needed. I just asked that he come upstairs. He sighed and I heard his footsteps. My heart was racing, and my hands were shaking. He turned the corner and I said, I think I am pregnant.
Now, I don't know what I was expecting his response to be. Excitement, surprise, crying? Nope, none of those. He went into panic mode. He kind of paused in a blank stare like Ross when he finds out Rachel is pregnant. We sat down on the bed together and just sat quietly. He grabbed the home pregnancy instructions to read over them again, asking me ridiculous questions like "did you accidentally get the test wet before you peed on it?" and other crazy things. I think it's just shocking because you imagine that getting pregnant will be a to-do project. You don't imagine it just happening. And Ian, he's a need to see to believe type of guy. After a few minutes, it finally settled in. And then, we just hugged and snuggled, while I laughed about his ridiculous response.
I'm pretty sure he doesn't remember where he went for his run after finding out such big news. Once it finally all settled in (although we're still kind of in a state a shock), we were filled will all kinds of emotions. Obvious excitement, disbelief, surprise, and somewhat nervous.
Ian, being the type of person that has to see to believe, needed more confirmation. We picked up another home pregnancy test during the day. When you're super early on, you're more likely to get a false negative if you don't pee on the stick at your first pee of the morning (your hormone levels are most high in the morning). So I decided to take the pregnancy test in the afternoon on that same Saturday. And once again, our pregnancy was confirmed.
When I brought the test out and showed him, he asked with a big smile on his face, "so we're definitely having a baby?". Yes, we certainly are! (Excuse the horrible pic - I am sans makeup and I hadn't showered yet).
On December 4th, we had our first doctor's appointment where blood results confirmed that we're expecting. Then, on December 10th we went in for our first ultrasound and got to see the little guy/gal.
Really, we couldn't decipher what was what on the ultrasound, but we got to see and hear our baby's heartbeat - a healthy 150 beats per minute. I started crying immediately. Ian was beaming. It was the most beautiful sound I've ever heard. Nothing can really prepare you for that moment. No matter how much someone tells you about how special that moment will be, nothing can describe it.
We got to hear the baby's heartbeat at our second appointment last week and were thrilled once again by that whooshing sound.
The news has finally settled in. Our families are ecstatic. Our friends are thrilled. And we, we are filled with excitement and pride. I can't help but feel completely blessed to have had this just happen, without us planning it. And although it will present some obstacles (I start back to school for my 3rd and final year just 4 short weeks after baby arrives, assuming this baby is on time), we are incredibly hopeful for our future as the three of us. We already talk to the baby everyday. We are planning for his/her arrival on a daily basis. We already are in love with this baby so much. I tell him/her everyday.
We are the first of our closest friends to go through this - so I'm kind of lost in terms of what are good websites, baby products, pregnancy products, etc. So I'm counting on some of my saavy readers to fill me in on the secrets. I can't wait to share this process with you!
2010 is going to be a year of newness, excitement, laughter, and lots of love. I'm loving this year already.