Tuesday, July 27, 2010

Discouraged at 41 Weeks Pregnant

I start back to school 4 weeks from today.  To say that I am anxious to have this baby is an understatement at this point in time.  I've watched all of my pregnant bloggy friends welcome their bundles of joy.  I've watched birth announcements appear on facebook from friends who were due 1, 2, and even 3 weeks after me.

I am getting so stressed out about having less than 4 weeks to adjust to mommyhood before I go back to school and have to be alert and on my A-game.  I have less than 4 weeks to build up a milk supply for the times I won't be here to breastfeed.  Time is ticking and I have no baby here with me yet.

Don't get be wrong - I am incredibly grateful that I am having such a healthy pregnancy that I do not need to be induced for medical reasons.  I have practioners who are very supportive of natural birth, and aren't discussing induction yet. 

I'm just feeling tired.  People keep saying "get some sleep", "go do things that you won't be able to do once she's here", "go out with hubby for date night", "go to the movies."  I am getting tons of sleep at night and taking at least one nap per day.  I am trying to get out once per day to go do something.  I am taking walks with Tessa and snuggling with her a lot.  Ian and I are enjoying each other's company while we're still just the two of us.  I am enjoying my time by myself!  But I'm just really ready.

I had been feeling very confident about labor and delivery.  But the fact that I am now 1 week past my EDD and have had a few previews of real contractions that don't amount to anything makes me feel so discouraged.  Why isn't my body ready?  Is baby not ready?  And if so, why?  Is she in a bad position and that's why I keep getting previews that don't amount to anything?  Labor begins when baby's body sends signals via hormones to my body, and then my body begins producing hormones to speed things up.  Why isn't her cute body sending me signals?  Or why isn't my body responding to them?

People keep suggesting that maybe our due date was off.  But I know that I tested positive extremely early and not to give a lot of information, but I pretty much know down to the day that our little one was conceived.  So basically we just have a stubborn baby on our hands.

I didn't know whether to put all of these thoughts out there because I know there are so many people out there who would give just about anything to be pregnant and in this position.  I am incredibly grateful that me and baby are both healthy.  I'm just ready for her to be here.  To hold her.  To snuggle her.  To care for her.  To love her.  Well, the loving part already started when I saw that plus sign 10 months ago.  But I'm ready. 

7 comments:

  1. I can understand why you would be so ready at this point, especially with school starting soon. I wish I had great advice to make the time go faster! Hopefully she'll decide it's time to come out soon! You must have made such a nice little home in there for her that she doesn't want to leave :)

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  2. Hang in there hun. I'm sure you've heard this before, but first time moms go an average of 10 days over their due date. In fact, I (being the first) was exactly 10 days late for my mom! I'm sure she'll make her appearance sometime this week! :)

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  3. It's SO hard to not be anxious right now. Hang in there. It WILL happen soon and believe it or not you'll miss your LO being in your tummy moving around. I know I do!

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  4. It's totally understandable why you're feeling the way you do! I hope she makes her appearance soon!

    xoxo

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  5. Hang in there. I was totally at that point a month ago!
    All I can say is: Start creating baby announcements (without the pictures), pay all your bills, stock up on non-perishable food that makes you happy (in case you have a crabby baby and need a break in the form of a snack- which is my case right now), learn how to type with one hand:)...and realize...baby will come.
    There are a few times I wish I was still pregnant so I could DO things, but I wouldn't trade my baby for the world.
    I feel for you. You can do it!

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  6. Do not be discouraged! If you can handle pregnancy...and...lawschool (lawschool finals...eeek)...you can handle classes and a baby...plus once finals come around...she will be older right? And you have your husband that will support you! I know you said your school wont work with you...but maybe your professors will... have you talked to them yet?

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  7. Hang in there lady, she is coming any minute now! I know doing the deed is the last thing on your mind but I found toward the end it helped things along a little bit. I am so so excited for you! :)

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