Tuesday, December 8, 2009

Two Sided

Do you have certain friends, who, you know when you tell them exciting news, will be received with immediate excitement, but that secretly behind that excitement, you know the person isn't 100% happy for you? 

I hate that feeling.  I remember when I got engaged, that a couple of my friends could've been slightly more excited, and I knew at the time that they were less than 100% happy for me.  Like a member of my family who I simply do not get along with - she was certainly less than thrilled to hear I was happy.

And I don't expect my friends to agree with every decision I make in my life.  I certainly don't with every decision they make.  I appreciate complete honesty in my friendships.  Some of the harshest comments I've received from friends have strengthened my relationship with them.

But I guess I'm talking about decisions that I've already made, that are completely personal which truly don't require their opinions (unless I've asked of course!).  Like job decisions, where Ian and I end up after I graduate, what I do after I finish school, when Ian and I decide to have a family.  Those big life decisions, I expect complete happiness on their part.

Is it jealousy? Hate? Unhappiness with their own lives? Dislike for me?  I'm really not sure. But I encourage people to be real, to stop pretending, and let their guards down.

Do I think every decision my friends make is "right"?  No.  But what is right for me is most likely not right for them, so who the hell am I to judge.  I know that if a friend decides something big in her/his life that I don't agree with, but that the decision has already been made and she/he hasn't asked my opinion, and he/she is happy, I'll swallow my opinion and be happy, happy for them, thrilled for them.  Because that's exactly what I'd expect from them.

4 comments:

  1. I know what you mean. I remember being nervous to tell certain people when I got engaged. I don't understand people who get jelous really. When I admire someone or wish I was more like someone, I look up to them, I don't resent them. Some people are just weird.

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  2. Yikes, I 2nd what Kim asked. everything alright? the bold is scary. :)

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  3. Kim and Annie - Yes! I'm totally okay. Just was talking with Ian about being afraid to tell a couple of our friends some things. Nothing current!

    Carrie - Thank you - at least I know I'm not the only one.

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